I can’t sleep. I’m faced with stuff that feels big.
Big. Bigger than me. I’m Robert Redford in “All is Lost”
A simple man in a life raft looking up at a container ship.
I’m no match for what is.
And yet. And yet. And yet.
My young niece about to be married is no match for what is.
My own wedding in 1986 brought together two families, created a love story
And 7 years later was no match for what was, or wasn’t
I made my brochure to say what I was up to yesterday morning.
It made for a very happy day.
And it was not match for what is.
I hope it is just vague enough to attract enough others so I can survive.
I fear for my survival, this little me in this little raft next the big container ship
7 Football fields long.
And I fear for all those others I may attract to my ships light.
Yes, nurtured hearts, be careful, we get burned by the flames, like moths.
Money is measured and quantified using the tools of the accountant.
The tools are so efficient and exact that you can miss this very small detail if you are not so lucky as I to find yourself quacking on that tiny life raft.
This detail, is this tiny you on the little raft dwarfed by the container ship.
If you miss it, you will misread the accountant’s numbers and take them for the Truth
Because they do sparkle and shimmer in the bright, bright Sun.
It is a tiny mistake, most bookkeepers make it.
So don’t be too hard on yourself.
I’m going to Niagara Falls
I expect to be awed
By the smallness of my size
Me, a human being
Living on a planet that is many times larger than those Niagara Falls
A planet that is a pale blue dot within unfathomable beauty
Where deep space meets colorful swirls of living light
The tools we use to make ourselves at home here
Ignores Niagara Falls, his love for us so unrequited.